The Scenario, On The Down-low

Behind closed doors, unspeakable acts and secrecy thrives. The down-low male blurs the lines between clear cut margins, black or white, good or bad, gay or straight. Society has involuntarily bred a new form of sexual identity, because the down-low male doesn’t want to identify himself as being gay or bisexual. He is by simplest definition a male who has a female partner(s) but engages in discrete sexual activities with other men. 

The DL scenario is no different from an individual trying to keep up appearances, masquerading a persona in order to be accepted and fit into the confines of social strata. The Jamaican male archetypes have always been defined by rigid traits and standards, the male ego is exaggerated and aggression and blatant ignorance are glamorized then reinforced in popular media. So where is the DL male’s place in a society that’s about black or white and doesn’t leave much avenue for exploring other grey emotions? He is forced to live double lives to avoid being bashed and becoming a social outcast but the damage to his self-esteem is unfathomable.

The TABS session got me thinking, who is at fault? Is it society who is wrong for not being more flexible and accepting, or is the down-low male at fault for not being honest with himself, his peers, his family and sexual partners? How big a role does he play in the transmission of sexually transmitted diseases and infections? And is it karma’s twisted sense of humour that comes into play when females who promote hatred against MSMs find themselves with a DL guy? 

I have come to this conclusion, it is human nature to adapt to survive, and charades exhibited by the DL male become his defence mechanism to endure in an unaccepting world, where he himself isn’t accepting his own truth. The craving and lust for another male becomes his forbidden fruit, and guilty partaking leaves him confused and ashamed, but sexually fulfilled. The feeling of another male’s body against his, inside him, the union of lusting lips, throbbing bodies and eager hands, it is his kryptonite. The DL male like any other MSM is entrusted with the duty to protect himself and his partners, while the moral card that comes into play becomes out of The Attractor’s realm of judgement. But The Attractor’s self-esteem and self-worth are high, and he desires to play a starring role in his partner’s life, not an occasional cameo.

The Attractor